To be or not to be that is the question,
whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer
the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
or by taking arms and, by opposing, end them... yada... yada..
Well, that's about all I can remember by heart and not even sure that is all correct. That's all I could think of while lying awake listening to what I can only describe as DH clearing a forest in his sleep, he's sawing so many logs. I fear my high school AP English teacher may be ashamed at the feeble attempt to recite Hamlet's soliloquy. And dear Billy Shakespeare is now rolling in his grave. I digress.
Today I was discussing beautiful baby making trials and tribulations with a good friend at work, who, sadly, recently lost her baby. My thoughts and prayers go to her and her husband. We were discussing whether it would be better to be able to get pregnant and lose the baby or to know that you can't get pregnant at all. I think they're both pretty crappy if you ask me. So it made me think of Hamlet's soliloquy. Don't think of the situation he's talking about, but more-so the "is it better to deal with the pain or do something about it" kinda thing.
Which brings me to another point of discussion my aforementioned friend and I brought up- the "doing something about it." I think every infertile I know has gone to a doctor and or specialist to see what's up, how do we fix this? How do you know if you're playing God? And at what point to you throw up your hands and "let go and let God?" Once, I saw a comment on a message board that Christians shouldn't think it's ok to have science help them conceive. I personally think that God and science co-exist because there wouldn't be science without God. So there.
I've kinda thought about the ethics behind fertility, treatments, and related sciences, but today my aforementioned friend brought it to a whole new level. She described how they do genetic testing on the remains to determine if there was a chromosomal defect by growing the stem cells in a petri dish. After this analysis the remains are then sent for burial. (This is at a catholic hospital in town which will here on out be known as Hospital AM) I gotta say when I heard this about the analysis I wanted to just say "WTF?" but we were at work so I didn't. We discussed how this DNA could be used to clone a human and how unethical that is. Not that Hospital AM would do that, but if I've learned one thing from CSI Miami....
So in conclusion, I'm more confused than ever. I don't know if there is a right answer. I think stress could be a factor, or maybe medication or some sort of emotional test, or a sick impractical joke. I also think it could be the twinkies.
At least I'm working on the twinkie part.
I also agree that God and science co-exist.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I view our miscarriage as a biology error--not a message from God, like so many people want it to be. Something went wrong with the embryo early on, probably chormosomally, and wouldn't have sustained life and so it was reabsorbed. Sure, one could argue that God created the mechanics of biology, etc. etc. but since Adam and Eve first sinned, we have become imperfect and our bodies as well. It may not be the correct view, but it gets *me* through each day that I'm unable to hold that baby.
I also agree that science and God co-exist (to a point). I do think that there are people out there who take things WAY to far, but when you are dealing with infertility you are just taking care of your body and helping things to work, you are not cloning something that shouldn't be there or creating things that should not exist in normal human life.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the being told you can't get pregnant vs you get pregnant and lose it, that is a VERY VERY fine line. I have had both at some point along the way and I honestly can't tell you which is worse. Losing a baby is HORRIBLE weather you are 2 hours pregnant or 2 hours from delivering, that is all there is to it. It was life and I believe it starts at creation.
When I had one of my miscarriages they were able to tell me it was a girl based off of the "testing" that they had done. They couldn't tell me what was wrong or even IF something was wrong, just that it was a girl. That was the one thing I didn't want to know because I had wanted a baby girl all of my life and now I found out I had lost one and it may have been my only chance to get pg? Really, thanks!
However being told you can't get pregnant is HORRIBLE too, but I look at it like this: "who said?" The dr's are not God, we are not God, only God knows if I can or can't get pregnant so until he sends me that little note stating I will not ever carry a child, I am going to try try try (and I know it gets old and you never thought sex would get old, but it does!!!!)
Don't let people or the situations you are in get you down, you are strong and you have to stay that way!!!!